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mapsedgeSo very strange, how a person's life and outlook can change in just a matter of minutes. When my sister called tonight from Colorado at 10:00pm (our time), I knew something was in the wind, a change coming for me and, by extension, my family.
My sister's basic message was brief: Our mother is dying, and will probably be gone within the next two weeks.
See how that works? It's a ripple effect, that change, and you, dear friend, probably felt it. I apologize if it's harsh, and I apologize for the literary tone of this post. I'm not sure yet how I'm supposed to grieve, so I don't know any other tone to take.
This story will be much longer before it is finally told. For now, I'm going to go to bed, plan a trip to Nebraska to see her one more time before she dies. God help me, I didn't expect to feel this way. It been a long love/hate relationship - mostly hate - and I expected to be happy, at least relieved, at this final resolution. It just isn't so. As I expressed to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
mljm earlier, it's like a leg has suddenly been removed from my chair, and now my world is kinda wobbly. I'm not ready to be an orphan.
I'll stay in touch, friends. I just thought you ought to know.
My sister's basic message was brief: Our mother is dying, and will probably be gone within the next two weeks.
See how that works? It's a ripple effect, that change, and you, dear friend, probably felt it. I apologize if it's harsh, and I apologize for the literary tone of this post. I'm not sure yet how I'm supposed to grieve, so I don't know any other tone to take.
This story will be much longer before it is finally told. For now, I'm going to go to bed, plan a trip to Nebraska to see her one more time before she dies. God help me, I didn't expect to feel this way. It been a long love/hate relationship - mostly hate - and I expected to be happy, at least relieved, at this final resolution. It just isn't so. As I expressed to
mljm earlier, it's like a leg has suddenly been removed from my chair, and now my world is kinda wobbly. I'm not ready to be an orphan.I'll stay in touch, friends. I just thought you ought to know.