General state of the Bill, December 4
Dec. 4th, 2016 11:30 pm![[personal profile]](http://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mapsedgeQuite the weekend. I'm exhausted, so I'll sum up.
Performance Saturday night. Was more "on" than I have been in a long time. Very sparsely attended, no surprise there; so discouraging. May try an online concert after the first of the year, see if removing geographical/travel barriers helps.
My voice needs more exercise. I'm losing my range as I get older.
Productive day, today, but not in the way I thought. The dining room carpet get vacuumed and shampooed and vacuumed again, and the room got a general dose of cleanup.
I've just about had it with the kitchen floor. The old tile is so damaged it's hardly worth cleaning anymore. Sheet lino as soon as I can find one I like and can afford.
Big, big meltdown/tantrum with Jami tonight. He started threatening self-harm, but I don't think he was serious but just grabbing for attention, and by sonny jesus he got it. We've told him that we have a limited - read: zero - tolerance for that, and that should we ever suspect him serious, into the hospital he goes. All this over requiring him to read a fiction book - any fiction book. He'll read dictionaries and encyclopedias all fucking day, but just try to get him to read Laura Ingalls Wilder or Terry Pratchett. We were considering putting him in public school, but that's put quit to that.
Anyway, internet is gone until he reads a chapter of something fiction. I guess that's how it's going to have to be: he can buy internet time by doing the reading he's assigned. I hate doing it that way, but if that's what it takes, that's what it takes.
I can watch horror movies and walk away unaffected because they're not real and they don't matter. My son is real, he matters, and now I have a migraine. Yee haw.
Tomorrow starts six months of being the only tech guy with Day Job. DataGuy has taken a contract assignment elsewhere until our business improves. DayJob just can't afford to pay us both, and most of the work needing to be done now is mine. This will likely mean not having to drive to Liberty every day if at all, and I'm totally cool with that. Just have to work it out with MoneyGuy so I can get paid via some other means than paper check. Shouldn't be an issue.
So very tired.
Performance Saturday night. Was more "on" than I have been in a long time. Very sparsely attended, no surprise there; so discouraging. May try an online concert after the first of the year, see if removing geographical/travel barriers helps.
My voice needs more exercise. I'm losing my range as I get older.
Productive day, today, but not in the way I thought. The dining room carpet get vacuumed and shampooed and vacuumed again, and the room got a general dose of cleanup.
I've just about had it with the kitchen floor. The old tile is so damaged it's hardly worth cleaning anymore. Sheet lino as soon as I can find one I like and can afford.
Big, big meltdown/tantrum with Jami tonight. He started threatening self-harm, but I don't think he was serious but just grabbing for attention, and by sonny jesus he got it. We've told him that we have a limited - read: zero - tolerance for that, and that should we ever suspect him serious, into the hospital he goes. All this over requiring him to read a fiction book - any fiction book. He'll read dictionaries and encyclopedias all fucking day, but just try to get him to read Laura Ingalls Wilder or Terry Pratchett. We were considering putting him in public school, but that's put quit to that.
Anyway, internet is gone until he reads a chapter of something fiction. I guess that's how it's going to have to be: he can buy internet time by doing the reading he's assigned. I hate doing it that way, but if that's what it takes, that's what it takes.
I can watch horror movies and walk away unaffected because they're not real and they don't matter. My son is real, he matters, and now I have a migraine. Yee haw.
Tomorrow starts six months of being the only tech guy with Day Job. DataGuy has taken a contract assignment elsewhere until our business improves. DayJob just can't afford to pay us both, and most of the work needing to be done now is mine. This will likely mean not having to drive to Liberty every day if at all, and I'm totally cool with that. Just have to work it out with MoneyGuy so I can get paid via some other means than paper check. Shouldn't be an issue.
So very tired.
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Date: 2016-12-06 02:58 pm (UTC)I hear your parenting struggles and empathize. I guess if a disagreement over reading material is the worst of it this week you're doing many, many things well on that front. :-) It's unfortunate that he's found a big trigger with you using threat of self-harm. I hope he quickly learns that threat is a bad choice and hope he has no intentions of acting on it-ever.
May your next six months be productive, calm, and positive. May you find a good work-life-other work balance that allows free time for being creative (I hope with music). May I get to hear/see you play and sing again sooner rather than later.
<3