A Typical Day At Work...

[mapsedge]

LEGEND
ME = me. As in, Bill.
DG = data guy. As in, my co-worker.

Yesterday:

DG. How are you doing on the Infiniti site?
ME. There's a problem with the javascript that controls vehicle searches. I'll have to spend the morning fixing that.
DG. Okay, that's your number one priority, then. See you in the morning.

Today:

DG. How are you doing on the Infiniti site?
ME. Still have work to do if they expect to go live over the weekend.
DG. Okay. Let's go over the to-do list. We need to give some love to Buick client, Chevy client, and Pontiac client.
ME. Right.
DG. So, today I'd like you to concentrate on Buick and Chevy.
ME. I'm not done with Infiniti.
DG. (shocked) You're not?
ME. (resisting the urge to bitch slap him) No.

(ME: also resisting the urge - the very strong urge - to say: I just told you one minute ago I wasn't done and Our lives would be so much easier if you would listen to people...)

DG. You'd better work on Infiniti then.
ME. (tasting blood) Looks that way.

I know we've all got a lot on our plate, but it's not like I'm asking anyone to memorize the Russian alphabet. I just want to feel like I have enough value to actually be listened to. Small wonder, three days out of five, I go home feeling frustrated enough to quit. If I wasn't forty and the father of two I probably would have already.

Comments

[rowangolightly.livejournal.com]

Um, this guy honestly says things like, "need to give some love..." in a business situation regarding clients?

He really needs to be bitch-slapped. ::raises hand:: May I, please? Please?

[billthetailor.livejournal.com]

Yes, "giving a client love" is his shorthand for doing what they've asked us to do, usually several weeks ago (which is why we lost a client yesterday - and he was shocked when they cancelled us. No shit.)

[rowangolightly.livejournal.com]

Seriously, man...next time I'm in town I think I should come into the office in disguise, as a new client and sometime during the meeting just get up and slap the shit outa him.

It'd be a pleasure! Really....

[iarraidh.livejournal.com]

Maybe you need to start a variation of the Hot Sex subliminal thing Kevin Nealon used to do on SNL when you see DG is not listening.

Here's how it might have worked this morning.

DG: How are you doing on the Infiniti site?
Bill: scrotum Still have work to do if they expect to go live over the weekend.
DG: (shocked into paying attention)What did you say?
Bill: I said, "Still have work to do if they expect to go live over the weekend."
DG: You said "scrotum".
Bill: (blinking innocently, looking genuinely perplexed) No I didn't. Why would you think I said, "scrotum"?
DG: You definitely said "scrotum".
Bill: (smiling) I think you need to cut back on the caffeine. Let's just get one with the list.

When somebody refuses to engage the Listen function, they give you leave to do it for them :)

[billthetailor.livejournal.com]

That's funny!

I did see your comments to my Christmas performance post, by the by. That you perceive me in that way humbles me greatly. My hope is to be even a half of that, then I ought to be doing pretty good. :)

[jehosefatz.livejournal.com]

Anytime you want to come to the dark side (J2EE/Tomcat/Linux) and move your family across-country, you're welcome to come work for me. It's likely I'll have 2 positions opening up in the spring.

Slowly, I've been building a commune of ex-KC natives out here. Soon, we'll be ready to launch our invasion of Vanouver. Then, the WORLD! Muwhahahaha.

- Jeho

[mljm.livejournal.com]

You have no idea how tempting it is...